Woo-hoo! As of today, I now receive more mail at the apartment than Addie. She says it's all just junk, but I beg to differ... anything that has enough decency to refer to me as Mr. Pendelton is worth something in my book. She's just jealous that one of those so-called "junk mails" contained a pre-approved credit card with a sky-high credit limit.

With my new found spending power, I'm planning to really fix this dump up. I've already got the home theater system on the way here with all of the best components plastic can buy and I've got my eye some really cool collectibles on eBay.

Alright, I'll admit I'm a little miffed that I can't get a card with a decent limit and rate while creditors seem willing to offer the sky to shiftless free-loaders like you, but it's not like I really have the money to pay off those kind of bills, anyways. How exactly are *you* planning to pay off your card, Pest? You don't have a single cent to your name.

(And the puppies and balloons on your card are a nice touch -- very masculine.)

Don't worry, Addie, I've got it all worked out. Considering the ease with which I obtained this card, I'll just get another card to pay off the balance. And then, I'll get another to pay off that one, and so on... I can't believe no one has thought of that.

They have, Pest. The only thing that's going to get you is a long line of collection agencies after you. And if you thought getting held at knife point by a burgular was unpleasant, you haven't seen anything yet.

I'd start combing the want ads if I was you...